the care and keeping of sara

I've kind of slacked off in the last couple of weeks. When people ask what I'm up to, I say, "Oh, just working, taking really good care of myself..." But to tell you the truth, I really ought to be treating myself better than I have been in recent days. I caught myself casually thinking rather dismal thoughts today, and that is just not who I am meant to be.

So after work today, I am going to make bread.

That might seem pretty silly to you, but for me, it's not. The quiet, methodical nature of it, as well as the high nutritional value, makes it the perfect gesture of love for myself. I'm so excited at the idea of eating homemade wheat bread and fresh spinach. Mmmmm...

I think it's important to be excited to come home from work and hang out with...me. As an adult, I have much greater responsibilities -- and joys -- than I did in the previous twenty years of my life, and I have to be at my best in order to accomplish them. It sounds weird to say that consistantly showing myself love is an essential part of functioning at my best, but it is.

So, I make bread. I journal. I read Conference talks. I breathe deeply. I attend the temple. I stand up straight. I listen to KLOVE. I go to bed early. I do stretches.

And I tell the nagging little voice in my head that says "you're not pretty" and "you'll never change" and "you are not worth the effort" to just STUFF IT. Because I am a daughter of God.

I "no longer have the luxury of spending [my] energy on anything that does not lead [me and my family] to Christ," to borrow a line from Sherri Dew.  And you know what, it feels really good to expend my energy in that way. If I make a point of being good to myself, I get double benefits: I take care of myself, and I get to be proud of myself for doing so. I am happy, which means that I have happiness to share with others.

Loving myself makes me able to build the kingdom, rather than assuming that I can't possibly have anything to share and therefore not bothering to share it.

If this is something you would like to learn more about, try any of the following resources:

• "You Matter to Him," President Dieter Uchtdorf. (Really, anything by President Uchtdorf is along these lines! I think it's the theme of his ministry.)
• "Living the Abundant Life," President Thomas S.Monson
• Matthew 5:13-16
• "Someone Worth Dying For," MikesChair
• "I Am a Child of God," Mormon Messages

What do you do to show yourself love?