Saturday, December 31, 2011

best of 2011 excerpts

Here's a sampling of my "Best of 2011" list.

  • Getting taken care of by a group of the nicest women you will ever meet. Who knew you could be so blessed working at a medical supply store? 
  • The Durham YSA ward. Healing up from a broken heart, meeting Danielle, Rachel, and Tom, getting to be pals with Sariah again. Learning about what it means to have a Spirit-filled home.
  • Developing a closer relationship with my mom.
  • Singing along to American Pie with Chris on the way to go see fireworks; spending the next three hours getting to know him.
  • Slow dancing in the kitchen with Chris to Breathing, by Lifehouse during that first week we started dating.
  • That first kiss after 5 weeks of long-distance dating.
  • Many long talks with Rachel and Cindy.
  • Getting a bed for Christmas from an anonymous donor. 

And, it's funny...I made a Worst Of list too, but the longer I look at it, the more I realize that each one could be on my Best Of list, too. It's true, I did not enjoy the first four months of the year, between heartbreak and the feeling that I was just spinning my wheels, but so much good has come because of it. I know so much more about myself and I have such a healthier concept of relationships. I better know what mistakes I am prone to, and I ALSO know that the Lord and I are capable of getting around them. That is so exciting to me.

I know that sometimes my family situation really makes me nervous about the kind of family I will have in the future. However, I've learned this year that man, my family is pretty great. We're all largely functional people, and those of us who aren't functional still do our best to be charming people. I like my family. And I like that I like my family. All things considered, it's not that hard to do. They're good people.

The challenge I am currently facing -- being poor and more dependent on the kindness of others than I ever thought I would have to be -- isn't much fun either. But I know the Lord wouldn't ask me to do it unless it was for the powerful and lasting development of my character. Because of this time in my life, I have a better understanding and appreciation of the Atonement. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be a better wife and mother as a result of it, too. I'll be better able to be a stay-at-home mom, and accept the generosity of my husband which that inherently requires, and I'll be better able to manage the finances of my future home because I have to be so conscious about it now.

Honestly, that's a lot of blessings, even if they have come from really hard things. I can't say I'd like to do it over again, but I'm sure grateful for the good things I've gotten out of it.

And, of course, I'm getting rich blessings out of hard situations currently, and I am tremendously grateful for those lessons. I'm also grateful that life isn't any harder than it currently is.