Tuesday, December 20, 2011

bucket list, revisited

"We can focus on the fun things we could have done but didn’t, or we can do something fun right now.

"We can dwell on the mistakes we made in past relationships, or we can focus on enjoying the relationships we’re in right now.

"We can think about all the opportunities we missed out on, or we can focus on embracing possibilities right now.

"There will always be something we didn’t do yesterday, but we get to choose right now how yesterday looks when we get to tomorrow. Right now, whatever age we are, this is our chance to live.

In March of 2008, I wrote a bucket list.

1. Fall in love.
2. Travel.
3. Learn.
4. Write.
5. Be beautiful.

And...to varying degrees...I've done them all.

Falling in love wasn't all it's cracked up to be, but it taught me a lot and I know better what to do in order to be a happy and fulfilled person. Namely, that you always have to love God more than anyone else, including yourself. 

I traveled to the UK and Paris last year, and it was the experience of a lifetime. If I never travel again, I will still say that I adore traveling and that if you want to go, just GO. I hope to travel more -- back to Paris, of course, but also to so many more places. Germany, Italy, Spain, Brazil, Australia, and somewhere in Africa would be incredible, for instance.

Learning is so much a part of my life. I've finished my degree now, and eventually I will go on to higher education. I'm learning to be patient about that, though, and learning the difference between "no" and "not now." I'm learning to play sports, to cook, to communicate honestly. I think a love of learning implies a divine discontent with who and where we are today, which is a pretty accurate description of how I try to live my life.

Once, I thought being a writer meant that you had to spout fiction out of your fingertips every day for an hour at a time. That's certainly one kind of writing, but very rarely the kind I do. Instead, I journal, I blog for myself, and I professionally freelance write. There are still stories swimming around in my head, but most days I am just focused on other things. 

For this last one, I'm going to directly quote what I said about this the last time:

"I want to be satisfied with who I am as God created me, with the humility to change and the courage to stand firm. I want to be happy with how my life has turned out, where I'm heading, and what I'm doing in the meantime to prepare for that. I want a beautiful life, full of love and adventure (even on just a small scale) and learning and God, and I want that beauty to come out in who I am."

Amen, me of almost 3 years ago. Amen.

1 comment:

  1. Ok, I stalk you all the time...but I am SO bad at commenting. Thank you for continuing to be my inspiration.

    The comment you left on my blog almost brought me to tears. (The Sam one.)

    I am so grateful for your example, your faith, and your friendship.

    God definitely put you in my life for a reason...

    and I definitely think you are beautiful!